Thursday, December 31, 2009

The Top Ten Reasons 2009 Sucked

Even though Top Ten lists have been scientifically proven to be complete B.S., here is why this last year totally sucked.

10. I had to admit that Daughtry is really good.

9. Despite being thankful to still have a job, the bonuses that make up a considerable part of my compensation package have taken a significant decline.

8. The Wii is broken.

7. I've abandoned more writing projects than I've sold.

6. I haven't spoken to my Dad all year for no reason other than we're both apparently pretty darn lazy.

5. I'm on cholesterol medication number three and I can't tolerate the side effects of it either.

4. I couldn't quite think up enough tidbits from this year to even describe ten ways it sucked.

3. I had a chance to go to Thailand with the Marines but blew it because no one told me I needed a passport until I showed up to get my plane ticket.

2. See Number Four.

1. I lived to regret saying, "If an Obama presidency is the price we have to pay to put the final nail in the coffin of the Clinton Legacy, I can accept that."

4 comments:

Faith Imagined said...

I am sorry 2009 sucked for you but I got a chuckle from you list!

Jeff Draper said...

Then my purpose in life is complete. Glad you liked it.

von Darkmoor said...

at least #1 wasn't that you didn't get to do anymore slushing for RBE. :) That comes in February - so don't be gone to Thailand then!

(p.s. - I loved the real #1 - though I never would have said that myself)

Jeff Draper said...

I return from Washington D.C. on Feb 5th and will have prepared myself by trudging through slush for two weeks.

The Obama/Clinton comment was made to a coworker back when we weren't sure if he'd get the nomination. At the time, the last thing I wanted to see was another, more ideologically driven, Clinton in the White House. Now I'm afraid that's the second to last thing I wanted to see. At least she would have understood the concept of triangulation and we'd get something out of the deal.